You get them, but you don't get to choose what they are. The list looks something like
1. I wish for a dollar.
2. I wish this dollar wasn't here.
3. I wish for two dollars.
4. I wish for two dollars less.
And so on until you reach one million, at which point you wish away all your money.

You obviously wished for no wish.

I wish for a turkey sandwich on rye bread with lettuce and mustard. And I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises -- you got it?

You get the sandwich. It's sealed inside a flawless glass cube. Also inside the cube is nerve gas. Don't worry, we told you about the nerve gas, so there's no surprise.
I wish I would remember to wish for things instead of just corrupting other peoples wishes.

You remember to wish, but your fingers refuse to type. You are forever doomed to never corrupt another wish ever again. The economy collapses just because.

I wish I had a bear suit.

You have one. However, you can't get out of it once you've put it on. Three hours and a trip to the hospital later, you're left wishing you never had a bear suit.
I wish a rich doctor would come along and sweep me off my feet.

Doctor Phil arrives at your doorstep and picks you up then puts you straight back down. You feel cheated because he is not a real doctor. I feel cheated because I am not rich and missed my chance at true love.

I wish that wishes became currency.

Wishes are now currency. You have none left.

Dang it, should have wished for more genies. I'm wish-broke now.

I wish for all the wishes ever made. I'm going to buy the world.

You have to remember what each individual wish ever made was first. If you don't, the world collapses into a gravitational anomaly.

I wish for a pair of jet boots.

I wish I could remember all of them.

You remember all of them, prompting you to forget what your original goal was in the first place.

I wish Asssprite would stop causing Logic Bombs.

I stop creating logic bombs by wishing for a universe that is governed exclusively by desire and thus has no logic or order to it.

And lo, nothing changed.

I wish for two more copies of myself.

There are now two extra w!tches. Each steal a third of your b!tches.
I wish for two more copies of w!tch.

There is no way to make that wish a bad thing. Curse you.

I wish for a magic hat.

You have a magic hat. It is sullen and disrespectful.
I wish the earths rotation slowed down very slightly so there were more hours every day.

The day gets longer, but the institutions of work and education get wise and decide to increase the hours you have to work, leaving you with the same amount of time

I wish i was funnier than sprite

You are now funnier than Asssprite, as well as everyone else. People can never take you seriously anymore.

I wish for the very first wish made in this thread.

You get a hat. It is ugly.
I wish you wouldn't wear it.

I don't wear it, because you wear it.

I wish you loved the hat.

I love the hat. Sometimes twice in one night.
Eeeeeeeeeeech.
I wish that this thread never took that turn.

It didn't. It took a turn for the worse instead.

I wish I was a Ghostbuster.

You are, you crossed the streams

I wish for some milk

Sharks can't drink milk.
I wish for a burger.